To all the "Too Harsh" parentsMar 30, 2021
Do you ever wonder if you can be too harsh on your kiddo? I actually don’t wonder...I KNOW. I am a straight-shooter always, and my kids can tell you it stings sometimes.
It took me a while to learn to let my honesty shine, shine, shine (thank you Paul Simon) instead of blind, blind, blind the people I love with its intensity.
The key is empathy- it’s why I'm an awesome mom, and it’s why I can lay it all on the line for my clients and get them big results.
When we weave empathy into parenting, it primes kids to receive major truth bombs they would normally flat-out reject. Starting with, “I see you are hurting,” before saying, “and I don’t take kids who scream at me to playdates,” ends a lot better than, “You can’t scream at me that way! Forget going to your friend’s house now!”
I have a client who has re-upped her package with me 3 times; she and I loooove each other! ....And, I recently discovered that she refers to certain moments in our sessions as “The Kaplan B*tch Slap”
Whelp...I totally have that coming. After years of getting feedback from my clients, I know why they love me. It’s because I love them fiercely, and I don’t f*ck around (same as I parent, btw).
I can’t think of any area where getting down to business is more important than parenting. Time with our kids is short and they’re learning constantly...our choices matter, which is why we also need so much love while we figure it out. Our mistakes HURT - yes we need to be made aware of them, and we need a freaking hug at the same time!
My client Alex picked up on this right away. When asked why she hired me, she said, “It's definitely a safe space with you, but I get faced with the inconsistency with what's going on, which is good because that pushes you into the space of breakthrough. It's powerful”
The mom who wants someone to call her on her BS, the dad who wants real, actionable solutions to his kiddo’s misbehavior...these are my people. They know that working with me means creating lasting change fast, with no distractions or detours. And they know it’s hard to find someone who can do this for you with love. I am special.
And if you worry you are too harsh, too direct, too intense as a parent - please realize you are special too.
It is a massive gift to your kiddo when you learn to channel your straightforwardness with love. If you’re ready to get my empathy and honesty to help you do this, set up a discovery call here, and let’s get cracking!!!
P.S. Here are two more testimonials to prove that being a straight shooter is something to be PROUD of:
“Just your straightforwardness and the fact that during that free consultation you actually did give us tools. We're like, yep, this! We can start to see the light.” - Jess
"The one thing that I really like about you is you’re no BS. If I’m not doing something, you’ll call me on it. And I like that because I don't want to be patronized. I've seen with other counselors just kind of like a check-in and I'm like, No, I need more than that. I need solutions. I need someone that's going to help me navigate this journey and deal with my day-to-day issues. In my first consultation I got the sense that you’re the real deal." - JoanMarie